What to do

[porCts1]

Whats up everyone?
First post under this name but you probably know me.
I got women issues.
I think I met the love of my life, but my girlfriend and have no problems.
How can I just leave the woman that I loved for five years because of a feeling.
This other girl makes me feel like I never have for anyone. We have gotten to know eachother and we are so much the same it's makes me sick.
I was happy with my girlfriend until I met the other chick and it kills me to think of hurting her.

Iam just getting settled in to my new life and I have to go and meet the most amazing hippy grower girl ever.
I dont want to make a mess of the nice life I have but I wont be able to live with myself if I let this girl slip away.

Im just rambling on now because I just dont know.

How can I leave a woman that will love me for ever to start somthing new with someone else.
THIS SUCKS

Sorry for wasting everyones time.

[Agent-Smith]

are you sure it's not just a fling?

[porCts1]

No I'm not sure.
Maby I'm just a horny bastard.
I've known her a couple months.
I've never touched her either.
She lives with her boyfriend but is not happy.
She is staying with some highschool friends this weekend and I'm hanging out.
I just don't know what to do.

[Agent-Smith]

you should sit down and make a list of the good and bad points of both girls. Make another list of the good things and the bad things that could come out of your decision, i.e. losing a house, a job, etc.

[porCts1]

Thanks Mr. Smith
I've thought about this a lot and everything in my head tells me to stay with my girlfriend and my heart tells me to go for the other chick.
I thought about leaving my girlfriend a couple years ago when we would fight every day. Now we dont fight everyday but I'm high everyday and I dont express my true feelings when I'm smoking everyday because I dont like the noise.

[Agent-Smith]

so then maybe you should go to the other girl. If you are not high do you fight with her all the time?

[porCts1]

More than I would like.
The fights arent like they used to be, not so bad, but I have also changed alot and am a much nicer, kinder blabla person so why would I have a screaming fight with anyone anymore, not my style.
Sometimes she tries so hard to get me to fight and I just turn my back to it, maby I dont care? I dont know. There are other issues that could be problems in the future.
I dont even really know this other girl but I have feeling that I never had with my current girl, or anyone for that matter.
I am still pretty young.
Well I'm out of here
later
thanks

[Green Supreme]

Grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.I mean really,you probably know most everything about your girl.Probably almost nothing about the new girl.People put on a show at the start of any relationship.Putting on the face they think you wanna see.At times it is all show.Pace yourself.Learn more about the new person before you trash the old.Initially you picked your girl for a lot of reasons.If the other girl was meant to be then it'll happen.No sense rushing in.

[vapor]

i would just suggest shut the fuck up with the mind babble and let the universe work it out, just be yourself.......

[Green Supreme]

Lol^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

[KG2]

Grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.I mean really,you probably know most everything about your girl.Probably almost nothing about the new girl.People put on a show at the start of any relationship.Putting on the face they think you wanna see.At times it is all show.Pace yourself.Learn more about the new person before you trash the old.Initially you picked your girl for a lot of reasons.If the other girl was meant to be then it'll happen.No sense rushing in.i agree but make your mind up quick because its not fair to your current girl friend or yourself and watch out if you cheat karma well get you

[KG2]

i would just suggest shut the fuck up with the mind babble and let the universe work it out, just be yourself.......
lol

[Agent-Smith]

Sounds like me almost, LOL .........I'm not writing this, I'm not writing this. :D

[Green Supreme]

and if yourself is a lyin,cheatin loser???

[Agent-Smith]

The fights arent like they used to be, not so bad, but I have also changed alot and am a much nicer, kinder blabla person so why would I have a screaming fight with anyone anymore, not my style.
Sometimes she tries so hard to get me to fight and I just turn my back to it, maby I dont care? I dont know.

That part actually. :teeth:

[burnie]

I`d hafta` be up front about it . But maybe not like you think ! More like next time she tries starting a fight , just look her straight in the eyes and ask her if she`d rather you weren`t around( or however you`d like to put it ) . Keep watching the eyes , and listen closely to her reply . You`ve been together long enough to realize the facts when she does reply . And if you split....don`t forget the break-up sex.......mostly way better than make-up sex !! LOL !! Almost as good as a good "grudge" f*ck ! Good luck with a tough situation . peace...burnie

[c-ray]

go for door #2

[CannyBus]

Make the distiction between Love and Lust, Love is better in the long run.

[porCts1]

Vapor, I think it did work it self out, and now I have to break the girl I loved for so longs heart.
I dont even know if this other girl wants me.We get along great and I think she does.

Green supreme, I work with this girl and live up the road from her, we ride to work together and hang out every day after work. I think I'm getting to know her better than most and I like it all. I know we dont live together and thats when the mask really comes off.

kg2, I'm not a cheater, well maby I am if I am still with my girl but getting all my emotions wrapped up with another, but not a sex cheater.

Burns, I know she wants me around, for ever, without a doubt, and thats hard to quit.

C-ray, your a mind reader

Cannybus, I dont think I'm a guy who gets caught up in lust, my big head ALWAYS over powers my little head with good reason to leave chicks alone.
I'm not even thinking of fucking this girl, well I'm not obsessed with the thought, but rather obsessed with the thought of spending time with her, getting to know her, and sharing my life with her.

If this happend a couple years ago when we would get into it all the time I would be gone in a second, but now its harder.
My girl and I both moved out of our parents house together and moved 100 miles away to be together.

One thing that would be hard is if I do get with the other chick we would have to move in together right away. I live in my girlfriends house and she lives in her boyfriends house. I own another house in the city, but its in the city. What if she is hell to live with.

I keep saying to my self "she gives me the most wonderful feeling, some would call it love"

My girlfriend is NOT a pothead. She useto smoke with me everyday when ever I wanted to she was ready. Now if I dont say anythig she could go a week or more without smoking with me. I smoke by my self 95% of the time when I 'm home. If it wasn't for me she wouldnt smoke or anything. She is starting to give me a hard time about smoking before we go out or bringing a joint. How long before she tells me the plants have to go, then I'll have to leave her ass anyway. She tells me she would never do that but I think she could.
She wants kidS and I dont,maby one in the future in like 10 years. she wants many starting now.
She is a god fearing person and I'm a mother nature loving person. I will NEVER teach a child of mine from the bible and she would never NOT teach her kids religion.

All the things that I just listed as problems are the things that the other chick sees eye to eye with me about.
One time my girlfriend and I were talking about raising kids and I said " I dont want to tell my kids theres a santa, I dont want to start there life off by lying to the kid. we could still give gifts and celebrate but without the lyes."
I got laughed at and blown off by my girl.
Now when I was talking with this other chick about kids SHE said the same thing about the lying and the kids. I've never heard anyone in my life say something like that, besides myself, but here she is saying my EXACT thoughts again.
I like to get high sometimes, shrooms, opium, a pill, whatever. Not often, a couple times a year. Every time I do my entire high is spent explaining to my girl why I like to get high. It's getting annoying, I like to get high sometimes so what, I still take care of what I need to. I was an addict once and wont let myself be again but she don't get that.
I'm thinking of this other chick Every second I'm not with her, thats just not normal for someone you want as a friend.I'm being eaten alive by the fact that I havent told her my true feelings. I HAVE to try to get this other girl. Here it is 3:30 in the morn and here I am still thinking of her. I'm with her for the better part of the work day and still cant get enough.

[freeheeler]

Sounds to me like you already know the answer. Coming from experience (2 small kids), I'd say "DO NOT stay in a relationship where you do not see eye to eye on having/raising kids!"

It's the hardest 'job' I'll ever LOVE, but man it can be torture on a relationship. IMO unless you're ROCK solid with your sig. other, kids shouldn't be an option. And once they're around, you'll find the grievances you have now, will magnify.

What if the other girl weren't in the picture? Why have you stayed with this girl for FIVE years? Lazy? Probably a little. Scared of hurting her? What's worse, staying with her and keeping her from her happiness, or breaking it off clean WITH NO KIDS in the picture? I'd say staying.

I was always a serial monogomist (GF to GF) before meeting my wife so I lived in a similar world. For me, I'm most happy when I make others happy. But GS is right. ALL women (and men) have issues. Find a girl who's issues you can deal with, and that's your keeper. Guaranteed this new one has them too. You just haven't found out what they are.

Have some heart to heart talks with your current girl. Tell her your firm stance on the big, life questions and see what she says. If you're not together on kids, lifestyle, etc, you shouldn't BE together.

And I'll probably get flamed for this here, but my personal opinion on getting high is that it is THE BEST icing on the cake of life, but for me, it doesn't replace the cake. Getting high every day without a medical reason, sounds like a lot. It's a fabulous tool for enlightening yourself on who you are. But who you are shouldn't always be high. Are there issues of your own that keep you coming back daily? Sounds like your next psylocibin experience should be by yourself in nature. That'll crystalize your vision quick.

Bottom line... we're only here once. You' say you're young so you haven't learned this yet (trust me, you KNOW you do, but that's the beauty of being young, you don't know what you don't know), life's short. Do everything you can to get yourself to the place that'll make you most happy. ONLY THEN, can you give yourself truly to someone else.

And I'll end with this, another of MY opinions, but you sort of asked for it. I'd be willing to bet this new girl won't work out in the long run either. She's new, and has taken over your conciousness, but is it her, or the awareness she's providing that you crave?

best of luck
freeheeler

[I_and_I]

I would try for some menage action.............

[Agent-Smith]

I would try for some menage action.............

Listen to the voice of reason. :rofl:

[OneLegUp]

I hope you do leave your current girlfriend...

She deserves someone better than you...............

[Dankdude]

I would stick to your girlfriend, she has put up with your shit for 5 years, where-as there is no guarantee that the next one will.

[resinman]

Can you post some pictures of the hippy chick and of your current girlfriend who is not a "pothead"

resinman

[ViRedd]

I hope you do leave your current girlfriend...

She deserves someone better than you...............


:thumbsup:

[muggles]

I found out when I was young that the reason the grass was greener on the other side of the fence is because that is where the old bull took all his morning constitututionals... :old:

Muggles :pipe:

[ihaveworms]

whatever your decision...

live and learn, love and die trying...

good luck brutha..

worms

[tj_142]

Man sounds like a great decision to make********>>I'm not married living with a chick and flirtin with another..kewl......so here is gig..........play it out pee at both places and be a cad.....
Is the one your with your life mate? If the answer is no and your secure with yourself then go after hippy grow chick........man I was 35 when I got married....but smelled many flowers along the way!!!!!

[ihaveworms]

well said tj... don't know about you fellas.. every once in awhile you run into some rotten cabbage instead of the expected beatiful flowers :p hehe

worms